Shyzer.com

In my quest to find a suitable chat software for the freebie forums, I was led to God knows how many different forums on the web. Unfortunately for me, in order to test out their chat software, I had to register on them all and make a few posts before I was granted access to the rooms. In doing so, I was reminded of something that I find peculiar about the Internet.

People love virtual Yes Men.

Time after time and time, I found forums that were dedicated to certain niches and which made little to no effort to bring in people with opposing views. I fully understand seeking out people with similar viewpoints and interests. But making it a closed group of only like-minded individuals sitting around in a virtual circle jerk kind of seems counterintuitive to me.

How good are you at telling where somebody is from based on their accents?

I scored 29 points, should have been 32 though. Click more to see my answers and compare them to yours if you so desire.

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EDIT: Yeah, thanks for telling me that video was dead now, losers. It’s back to the NBC link.

EDIT: I changed the link to a different video site because NBC sucks.

Somebody get this man his own TV show. He’s been the most entertaining part of the Olympics by far. I’d pay good money just to have him follow me around and provide commentary on whatever I was doing.

Datz a good typing. Yes, yes, go to Shyzer! Ohh, ohhhh, de page is loading! Itz haz loaded!!!! Jou are champion at ze Internetz!! Woooo!

Auburn University has seven Olympic medals so far, more than India, Brazil, and every other nation except for about a dozen. Phelps swims for the University of Michigan, which means they’d probably rank in the top 5, but unfortunately their athletic site was last updated in July so screw them.

Or how about this. The nation of Georgia is in the midst of an invasion by Russia and has three medals in the Olympics.

Canada has zero. There’s really no correlation between a war and Olympic medals, but it’s still funny as hell.

I don’t mean to make light of the situation in Georgia though. I’ve been absolutely glued to a million different news outlets in an attempt to absorb as much info as possible. I’ll spare the lecture, but I do want to share this amazing Slate article about the cyber warfare that’s going on now.

At first glance most people think of cyber warfare as some futuristic War Games type of fantasy. But it’s not only real, it’s here and it’s effective.

Long story short, pretty much all of Georgia’s main websites are down. Some of the news agencies have moved to Blogger (it says something when Google is the most secure option a company has) and nobody knows if the attack is being coordinated by the Russian government / military, a collection of “hired guns” by the former, or an outright loose coalition of random hackers who saw this war as a perfect opportunity for a little fun.

Needless to say, the latter is the scariest scenario. It’s only a few steps away from a handful of people being able to shut down a country’s entire Internet infrastructure. Think of it like Die Hard 4, but without the crappy acting and shitty plot.

Ever wonder which countries are still holding out against using the metric system?

You know how I can tell the Olympics are back again? My old post with the Misty May / Kerri Walsh photos is getting a ton of search engine traffic.

Oh, well that and the fact that I’ve been glued to the TV for the past 48 hours. What’s the over / under on how much I get accomplished in the next few weeks? It doesn’t matter, just take the under and bet the kid’s college fund.

EDIT: Who else just saw that epic comeback by the US swim team? AMERICA, FUCK YEAH!

EDITED EDIT: I love this photo.

First off, ESPN needs to die. Seriously. Somebody go blow up Bristol. I’m the biggest Favre fan in the world and even I couldn’t stand watching it anymore. I officially apologize to the Sports Community for the past two months.

I became a football fan because of Brett Favre. I was a Favre fan before I became a Packers fan.

I wholeheartedly believe in the Madden Curse. It’s stupid and illogical of me and I don’t care. It’s real, Favre’s on the cover this year, ipso facto he’s gonna suck. It’s basic logic, folks. It’s pretty easy to see how Favre + shitty team + going from small town where he can do no wrong to New York where you get booed for sneezing = oh shit.

Seriously, New York is not going to be kind to him. At all.

Up until tonight, I honestly expected to follow Favre to whatever team he went to. It’s pretty clear there’s a lot of blame, but Christ if the Packers didn’t botch him from day 1. I’m not even sure I believed he’s actually switch jerseys though.

I was a Ken Griffey Jr. fan before I became a Mariners fan. When he was traded from the team in 2000, I considered jumping ship and following him to Cincinnati. But I stuck with the team since players come and go and my current boycott of them notwithstanding, I think it was the right move. I try not to think about asking when my faith and loyalty will go rewarded though…

All that said, I will root my ass off for Favre to win every game this year. I hope he gets all the way to the Superbowl. But I hope my Pack beats him there.

Angela, get ready!

This is weird though. It’s also just a damn sport. That’s a lesson 16-year-old Goob is really glad 25-year-old Goob has learned. I think that’s the best part about this whole thing.

What do you get when you combine Joss Whedon, Neil Patrick Harris, and Nathan Fillion? Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog!

Lucky for you, free viewing is now available through Hulu (of course, that happens THE DAY AFTER I buy the season pass on iTunes, but whatever). There’s no telling how much longer it’ll be offered for free, so get in on it while you still can.

Act 1
Act 2
Act 3

They’ve just announced plans to do a 4th act, so hell to the yes for that! I never thought I’d enjoy a musical as much as this.

While perusing through my Shyzer e-mail account the other day, I wound up skimming through my junk folder looking for a verification e-mail that unluckily and incorrectly was flagged as spam. I wasn’t really paying attention to what all the other subject lines read, but then I noticed Favre’s name out of the corner of my eye. And what, is that Mandela beneath his? Wait a minute…

Now let’s break this down. In the span of 25 messages or so, we get the following headlines:

Cindy McCain Talks About Her Boobs
Brett Favre Signs With Vikings
Mandela Found Dead on Birthday
California Serial Killer on the Loose

Who are they targeting with these?! On my list of people I want to hear and/or see talk about their boobs, Cindy McCain is at number Eleventy Billion, right between my mom and Barbara Walters.

Favre signing with the Vikings is obviously tailored towards me, but why in the world would I want to read something about that? My first reaction to such a headline would be to vomit in the nearest trash can, not open the damn e-mail. And what do they expect me to do upon realizing it’s just spam for a Viagra knockoff? Feel so relieved that I want to rewards myself with a prolonged erection?

Mandela dead on his birthday? What the hell? Why drag the name of one of the world’s most respected men into this debacle? Although I’d be willing to bet most people think he’s already dead, so what percentage of the public would this be effective on? 10%? Lower?

And finally, the serial killer running amok is a nice page out of the major media playbook. “Tonight at 11, tune in to find out what will likely kill you and your entire family before dawn. Also, Skip brings you the latest sports highlights and Phil has the weather!” Lucky for me, I don’t live anywhere near California. So unless he gets a wild hair up his ass and decides to go on a roadtrip, I think I’m safe.

EDIT: I just checked my spam folder again and found these two nuggets of awesome: “Bodyguards Positioned Outside Jolies Vagina” and “Senator John McCain Wishes To Have Sex With Model Heidi Klum; Others” - HAHA. The mental image of the first one totally makes it and the second one only turns awesome with the addition of “others.” Oh come on, tell me! I feel like it’s that news tease all over again!

I just received a job offer. I think I might take it.

Five brownie points to whoever uses the title to figure out what country the job is located in.