Shyzer.com

First off, I need money. And by “need” I mean “would kill for” and by “would kill” for I mean “Literally, give me a name and a figure and I’ll kill him.” So, everybody go buy my useless shit that I found in a pile at the bottom of my closet that nobody in their right mind would want stuff that I’m selling on E-Bay. I honestly don’t expect anybody anywhere to buy any of it. All that shit is headed for the trash if not sold.

Now, for another installment of something I like to call “Dear [insert asshole here],”

Dear bitch in charge of my group. I don’t know who the hell made you captain of our group. I understand we have a project due and I understand that you want to do well on it, but I couldn’t care less about how little time you have and how all 12 of us must plan our meetings around your schedule. Whoopde-fucking-do that you did the essay all on your own without any of us asking you to or any of our input. Let’s just all pray you didn’t fuck it up while you sit there and direct us around like we’re your personal live puppets. Stop being such a fucking pain in the ass and let us lazy people wing the fucking class presentation. IT’S ONLY 10% OF OUR GRADE! I can piss away 10% and still make an A without breaking a sweat. Don’t sit there and make bitchy comments to me about “not preparing properly.” I nailed my part thank you very much and might I add without the aide of those trusty fucking notecards that you so demanded I make. God people like you piss me off.

I am getting so sick of this layout. I want something a little more clean, a little more smooth. I wonder how long it will take me to get off my ass and start doing something about it. I’m putting my money on never, but we’ll see. Now it’s time for me to go finish bullshitting my essay for history.