Shyzer.com

I really love this site. Unless you own a website, or even just a blog, you won’t quite understand. I know I can’t code worth a shit. I know my skills in the graphics department suck ass. And I also know that my writing may not be the most interesting thing in the world to read. But I love doing it. This site is like my child. It’s not just something that I can easily walk away from. You have no clue how many times I just wanted to hop on my computer and start typing away. But I’m glad I restrained myself. I had to prove to myself that I was still in control of my life, that I still could do what I actually wanted to do.

I underwent some major changes this summer in my life. One of the biggest was saying goodbye to Spartanburg, the town that I loved to hate. With all the time that I spent away from it, it made me realize where home really is. I love being there mainly for the comfort associated with it, nothing more. After being in Virginia and California, I can safely say that I can’t wait to graduate so that I can finally leave South Carolina. Maybe not for good – hell, maybe I’ll end back up in Spartanburg. But I need to get out of here for a while. A good friend said that it’s almost like people are running from the problem and that’s true. But most of us don’t see it that way. We see it as running to where we actually feel wanted and welcome. Liberals can’t thrive in South Carolina. It’s just not possible without fighting for it everyday. And I don’t feel like fighting that battle any longer.

Another was grappling with the fact that I had to accept the fate of my parents’ relationship. For the past few years it’s been something that I never really thought would affect me since I was out and on my own. Whatever happened between them was their problem and fate and I would just accept whatever happened and move on. But it was a little harder then I thought. I think it finally hit the day after my family moved to Virginia and my dad and I were left to finish cleaning out the house that I had grew up in and I had to leave – never to return. When I woke up the next morning at my friends, I just thought to myself, “Ok, I’m ready to go home.” Then I remembered I didn’t have a home. I drove by my old house a few times this summer and saw the new people living there. I just wanted to scream to them to get the hell out of my house.

Tommy and I had a running joke that we always laughed at when we were out shopping or something. Whenever we would see some fake family in a picture frame or an actual family walking around, we would just laugh and say “Now, THAT’S what a happy family looks like…” This summer that joke lost it’s humor though.

The only good thing that I could draw from my parents’ divorce what that it finally silenced those people whom I grew up with that were still under the false assumption that I had a perfect family. It always appeared to people on the outside that since we appeared to have a good supply of money, a nice home, good cars, and my parents never fought publicly that my house was perfect. I always hated that; hell, I still do. But at least now I don’t have to hear people tell me how much they wished their family was like mine. Don’t get me wrong, I love my family. But I was sick and tired of people thinking we were some perfect family that never experienced anything negative.

I worked another job in which I was reminded why I am going to college and why I don’t want to work for the rest of my life in a boring and unchallenging job. If I can’t use my mind wherever I am working, I know I won’t be happy. Trust me, catering to a bunch of vacationers for the rest of my life would send me to an early grave. I applied for a few internships for next year and hopefully I’ll get one of those, which will help give me a better idea of what I want to do after I graduate. I swear, as the days pass by, it’s looking like my best only choices will be law school or teaching, neither of which I really want to do.

Another major adjustment was learning how to be single again. During the past few years, I never really wondered how I would go about being single because I never thought I would have to worry about that again. But this summer, I was forced to face that realization again and along with it came the floods of uncertain questions, none of which were fun to confront. What is one of the biggest things I hate about being single you may ask? Sleeping alone in a big bed. It sucks! But then again sleeping with somebody in a small bed is no picnic itself, so I guess it’s twofold. But still, being single again was a whole new ballgame. It just felt weird.

BUT, despite any and all of the negative things that happened this summer, there was one thing that made me certain everything happens for a reason. There was one thing that made me ultimately smile in the end and realize that the events that led to this summer were a blessing in disguise. Easily, the best part of my summer without any possible doubt, was the time I spend bonding and growing closer with my brother Clay. It was ungodly hard seeing him leave to live in Virginia. I’ll miss seeing his grinning face every day as I walk in the door and I’ll miss hanging out with him at night. I’m heading up there next weekend to take him to a Mariners game in Baltimore – this is serious stuff folks. When an older brother takes a younger brother to a Mariners game, you know there’s a serious bond there. But after next weekend, I have no idea when I am going to see him next, which sucks ass. But, like I said, this summer was well spent with him. I couldn’t have asked for anything more.

But alas, here I am now. Ultimately, not that much different from where I started, save for a few new memories and a few different outlooks on life. I’ll being posting full time again now, which means every day if possible, just like always. I’ve got a few new sections going up within a week or so, one of which will be titled “Supporting Cast” and will pretty much give a short bio of all the people I talk about in my blog every now and then. For the most part, things are pretty good right now. My Boys have fallen out of first place and in a free fall, so this season is all but done for. Hey, I knew it would happen back in May, so honestly I can’t say that I’m surprised. BUT, I’m still going ot take my bro Clay to see them next weekend up in Baltimore. But I guess I should save that for another post… =)

God it feels good to be back.

No, this isn’t me coming back just yet. That will probably be happening after I get back to school in mid August. While I’ve been away, there have been some things that I have been foaming at the mouth to talk about and I can’t hold back anymore.

As I am sure all of you know by now, earlier the Supreme Court struck down the anti-sodomy law in Lawrence v. Texas earlier this summer, which has finally put some attention on homosexual marriages. Earlier this month, I stumbled across this little piece of work…

Americans must preserve institution of marriage
By Rick Santorum
The majority of Supreme Court justices may not be willing to admit it, but everyone else seems eager to acknowledge that the greatest near-term consequence of the Lawrence v. Texas anti-sodomy ruling could be the legalization of homosexual marriage. Although the court’s majority opinion attempts to distance the ruling from the marriage debate, the dissenting justices say, “Do not believe it.” Major Web sites such as America Online’s home page, as well as newspapers and TV commentators, have signaled that the decision puts the gay-marriage debate in high gear. The Washington Post’s front page trumpeted, “A debate on marriage, and more, now looms.” And Newsweek’s July 7 cover asks: “Is Gay Marriage Next?”

Before, the right to privacy in sexual matters was limited primarily to married couples. Now the court in its sweeping decision expanded constitutional privacy protection to consensual acts of sodomy, striking down anti-sodomy laws in Texas and 12 other states.

The court’s majority opinion telegraphed unmistakably its position on the question of homosexual marriage. It listed “personal decisions relating to marriage” among the areas in which homosexuals “may seek autonomy,” just as heterosexuals may.

The dissenting justices, including Chief Justice William Rehnquist, noted: “Today’s opinion dismantles the structure of constitutional law that has permitted a distinction to be made between heterosexual and homosexual unions, insofar as formal recognition in marriage is concerned.”

After the ruling, Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist, R-Tenn., expressed concern over the court’s encroaching upon Americans’ right to protect the family and joined the majority of Americans in backing a proposed constitutional amendment to ban homosexual marriage. I also would support a constitutional amendment to affirm traditional marriage.

In fact, I believe that Congress has an obligation to take action to defend the legal status of marriage before the Supreme Court or individual state supreme courts take away the public’s ability to act. Every civilization since the beginning of man has recognized the need for marriage. This country and healthy societies around the world give marriage special legal protection for a vital reason — it is the institution that ensures the society’s future through the upbringing of children. Furthermore, it’s just common sense that marriage is the union of a man and a woman.

There is an ocean of empirical data showing that the union between a man and a woman has unique benefits for children and society. Moreover, traditional family breakdown is the single biggest social problem in America today. In study after study, family breakdown is linked to an increase in violent crime, youth crime, teen pregnancy, welfare dependency and child poverty.

Marriage has already been weakened. The out-of-wedlock childbirth rate is at a historically high level, while the divorce rate remains unacceptably high. Legalization of gay marriage would further undermine an institution that is essential to the well-being of children and our society. Do we need to confuse future generations of Americans even more about the role and importance of an institution that is so critical to the stability of our country?

The last thing we should do is destroy the special legal status of marriage. But galvanized by the Supreme Court victory, proponents of removing that status are out in force. Ruth Harlow, lead attorney representing the plaintiffs in the Texas case, said, “The ruling makes it much harder for society to continue banning gay marriages.”

That is where we are today, thanks to the Texas ruling. But the majority of Americans will have the final say in the battle to preserve the institution of marriage.

I hope elected leaders will rally behind the effort to defend the legal status of marriage from a non-elected group of justices, and I urge you to join those elected leaders in this vital case.

Rick Santorum is a U.S. senator from Pennsylvania and chairman of the Senate Republican Conference.

Yes folks, this is an actual United States Senator speaking here. I literally don’t even know where to start. So let’s just look at his first idiotic point. Santorum argues that “it’s just common sense that marriage is the union of a man and a woman.” Well hell, it’s common sense to do a lot of things, but we don’t have constitutional amendments enforcing them. Santorum claims the “out-of-wedlock childbirth rate is at a historically high level.” Well good! If the parents don’t want the child, let them put up those children for adoption, let the gay couple adopt them, and we can work together to make sure these children have a good home to grow up in.

Santorum keeps bringing up the breakdown of marriages leading to the breakdown of families, yet he fails to even once begin to link how homosexual marriages will lead to traditional marriages falling apart. Furthermore, he fails to show any proof that a majority of homosexual marriages will end up in failure and help speed the “decline” of society due to failed familes.

It’s people like Santorum and the Senate’s majority leader, Bill Frist, who are finding ways to encourage the attitudes that keep homophobia alive and well in this country. Frist, said the court’s decision threatens to make our homes places where “criminal activity … would in some way be condoned.” I see: Open the door to consensual sex between gays, and all kinds of hell will break loose in America’s bedrooms — you know, polygamy, bigamy, prostitution, incest, hell, who knows what else?

These homophobes want a constitutional amendment to ban same-sex couples from being able to have the same rights and privileges that straight women and men can by the simple act of a marriage contract. However, there is no way any of these conservatives could argue against the fact that this would insert religion into the Constitution, because their objection to gay unions comes straight from the document the religious right relies on: the Bible.

Like it or not, the USA is firmly rooted in the principle of separation of church and state — despite recent attempts to blur that distinction. A constitutional amendment would profoundly alter that founding intention. While I want to believe that the proposed amendment is unlikely to become law, the mere fact that such a movement is afoot is alarming. Its archaic language would further institutionalize discrimination against gays. (Not that it isn’t done already: Thirty-seven states, including good ole’ South Carolina, have “defense of marriage acts” limiting marriage contracts to persons of the opposite sex and banning recognition of same-sex marriages, even if legal elsewhere.)

As for the argument that sanctioning gay unions will undermine “traditional” marriages: how? Marriages between men and women will get along just fine, with children, infidelity and divorce intact. Those opposed to gays marrying ignore that marriage is, in the state’s eyes, a civil contract, not a religious one. Let’s keep religion out of this, just as our forefathers kept it out of the Constitution.

Without legal marriages, gays are denied shared property arrangements, adoption rights in many states, joint insurance and bank accounts, inheritance rights and more. Perhaps the most poignant example of what the lack of such a contract confers happens in a hospital corridor. Any floor nurse who thinks like Frist and friends has the authority to arbitrarily deny anyone the right to visit a partner who’s seriously ill because she or he is not “family.”

The scientific evidence now indicates that homosexuality is hard-wired into men and women, meaning it isn’t some curable disease and that neither therapy nor prayer can change that. In other words, God in his infinite wisdom made some of us gay, some of us straight. If people like Santorum and Frist begin to gain support and ultimately win their ways, I will strongly consider raising my family elsewhere. My child will not grow up in such a close minded society.